Sunday, September 19, 2021

Review: With the End in Mind: Dying, Death, and Wisdom in an Age of Denial by Kathryn Mannix


4 stars for With the End in Mind: Dying, Death, and Wisdom in an Age of Denial by Kathryn Mannix.

This is a book about end of life, palliative care and making the most of what remains of life in comfort (rather than trying to cure of cancer and illnesses). Within are real-life stories that illustrate the journey of shrinking horizons and final moments. The author hopes that through her sharing, the knowledge that is common to all when death takes place can be a guide and comfort to people contemplating death.

What I like most about this book is learning to recognise the beginning of the process of dying that leads to the thing that happens at the end of every life. Whether it is anticipated or unexpected, the truth is, we are all walking towards death from the day we are born. There are many books written on the topic of living and dying and what to expect towards the end of life. But this is the first book I have read that actually walks us through the finer details of the process of dying towards the final moment.

Also, I agree with the author that the more we understand about the way dying proceeds, the better we can manage it. When death is being discussed, talked through and prepared for, it will not be unbearably sad or frightening. In fact, the well-being of the patient, caregiver and family members will be taken care of physically, emotionally, socially and spiritually. To quote "Open discussion reduces superstition and fear, and allows us to be honest with each other at a time when pretence and well-intentioned lies can separate us, wasting time that is very precious."

The author has written this book with the end in mind, to prepare people with the process of dying and to provide food for thought. I think she has achieved what she set out with, at least with me. One thing I know for sure is, where I want my end to happen, that is if I get to choose. To quote "Instead of dying in a dear and familiar room with people we love around us, we now die in ambulances and emergency rooms and intensive care units, our loved ones separated from us by the machinery of life preservation."

This book can help us to live better and die better by keeping the end in mind. To quote "Living is precious, and is perhaps best appreciated when we live with the end in mind." And so, I recommend reading this book. Because in the end, the story is about us.


Publisher: Little, Brown Spark; 1st edition
Publication date: 16 Jan 2018

*** Favourite Quote 1 ***

Immortality seems in many ways an uninviting option. It is the fact that every day counts us down that makes each one such a gift.

*** Favourite Quote 2 ***

There are only two days with fewer than twenty-four hours in each lifetime, sitting like bookends astride our lives: one is celebrated every year, yet it is the other that makes us see living as precious.

*** Favourite Quote 3 ***

Open discussion reduces superstition and fear, and allows us to be honest with each other at a time when pretence and well-intentioned lies can separate us, wasting time that is very precious.

*** Favourite Quote 4 ***

Living is precious, and is perhaps best appreciated when we live with the end in mind.

~ With the End in Mind: Dying, Death, and Wisdom in an Age of Denial
Kathryn Mannix

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Dr. Kathryn Mannix has studied and practiced palliative care for thirty years. In With the End in Mind , she shares beautifully crafted stories from a lifetime of caring for the dying, and makes a case for the therapeutic power of approaching death not with trepidation, but with openness, clarity, and understanding.

Weaving the details of her own experiences as a caregiver through stories of her patients, their families, and their distinctive lives, Dr. Mannix discusses the universal, but deeply personal, process of dying. With meditations on life, death, and the space between them, With the End in Mind describes the possibility of meeting death gently, with forethought and preparation, and shows the unexpected beauty, dignity, and profound humanity of life coming to an end.

*Blurb from Goodreads*

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