Crochet: Shawl: Kalinda Wrap

Most of the shawl patterns I have come across start off with a magic ring. As such, I have come to expect the same for this Free Pattern. So, you can imagine my surprise when I realise this shawl, more of a wrap actually, begins with a foundation chain instead. While I understand the reason for the foundation chain, I also know I am signing myself up for a tough challenge when I decide to go ahead with this wrap that begins with a chain 139.

I know I will have less of an issue with the setup row (row after foundation chain) if I am using acrylic yarn which is more bouncy and stretchable as opposed to 100% soft cotton yarn. As it is, 20 stitches into the setup row, I know I have to undo everything to redo the foundation chain. Sadly, after the foundation chain is completed a second time, I still find myself struggling to insert my hook when I reach the setup row. It also did not help that I have chosen to start off with the outer dark colour of the skein of yarn, a deep purple instead of the inner light colour yellow. I find myself getting increasingly frustrated with trying to see and to insert my hook into each stitch. In the end, I tell myself "do not be afraid to start over" and promptly undo everything a third time.

I decide that the way to keep my sanity is to change the hook size from 2.5mm to 3.0mm and to crochet a loosely held foundation chain (more so than my second attempt). I quickly get down to work and am pleased with the changes I have made.  Though I still need to use the pointed end of a stitch marker to pry open each stitch on the foundation chain to insert my hook to crochet a double, it is so much easier now. And of course, everything is a breeze after the setup row.

I will say it is to my advantage for having crochet and completed the Kalinda Shawl prior to this project. The pattern is different yet similar. If I have not done the Kalinda Shawl and skipped right to this Kalinda Wrap, I am sure I will be confused about the stitches and made countless mistakes. The Kalinda Shawl is a good place to start on these Kalinda projects, and as a starter, the creator provides stitch count at the end of each row which gives affirmation on whether that row has been crochet correctly or not. Though no stitch count is given for the Kalinda Wrap, I am familiar enough with the pattern by now and have no issue at all. It is just as well; I am tired of all the counting. The affirmation at the end of each row comes in the form of the number of stitches left after the special pattern is applied.

Besides applying the basic stitches in crochet, namely slip stitch, single crochet, half double crochet, double crochet and triple crochet, this pattern also uses the more exotic stitch, sc3tog, dc3tog and BLdc3tog. I gladly welcome these decreasing stitches, and before I know it, am familiar enough with them to crochet without having to refer to the instructions.

I take my time to crochet the Kalinda Wrap and find myself enjoying the repeating stitch pattern. It has a calming and meditative effect. If you are looking to crochet a shawl/wrap with a meditative stitch pattern, this is the one for you.

Review: Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness by Susannah Cahalan

5 stars for Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness by Susannah Cahalan.

This book unfolds like a heartrending drama of a person's descent into madness, but sad to say, it is a true story, a work of non fiction, a blend of both memoir and reportage, of a girl's struggle against losing herself.

The author, Susannah Cahalan, is diagnosed with a rare auto-immune disease called anti-NMDA receptor encephalitis. Put simply, it is a condition caused by the body's antibodies going haywire and attacking normal, healthy brain, leading to brain inflammation. This book is a detailed account of her tumultuous journey, her long and painful road to recovery, from the onset symptoms of headache, insomnia, forgetfulness, numbness, loss of appetite, nausea, confusion, hallucinations and seizure to her hospital admission, brain surgery, diagnosis, treatment and finally rehabilitation. This book is also the result of her attempt to uncover the time lost, to piece together the events which she has no recollection of, and to share those confusing months with the world.

In reading the dark period that Susannah Cahalan has put together, it is petrifying to imagine teetering on the edge of existence between the real world and a murky fictitious one filled with hallucinations, paranoia, seizures, strange thoughts and visions. As if these are not enough, she also suffers from high blood pressure, erratic heart rate, breathing difficulties, psychosis (disconnection from reality which results in strange behavior), catatonia (abnormal state of unresponsiveness, affecting behavioral and motor functions in a person who is apparently awake), language impairment and motor speech impairment (inability to speak properly and express oneself coherently).

As a result of all the horrors that the author has to go through, it is especially touching and heartwarming to see how her family and friends and even her appointed doctors stand by her and fight for her throughout this difficult period in her life. Her recovery process is filled with love and care and unwavering support from her parents and boyfriend. They believe that though Susannah's personality is buried under all those fuzziness, deep down, she is still there, and that things will get better, with time. It is equally heartening to see how she slowly recovers, gains back her health, confidence and sense of self.

All in all, Brain on Fire is a remarkably well written book. The fact that the author is a journalist working for the New York Post, in all likelihood, contributes to her excellent writing and great arrangement of events in chronological order. Though the book is a long account of her illness, including the before and after, author Susannah Cahalan makes it easy to read by breaking down the lengthy narrative of connected events into short manageable chapters.

At the end of the day, what stands out most in the entire story, is not the illness itself, nor what happens before the diagnosis or after, but the realisation of how critical it is to be at the right place, at the right time, without which there can be no comfort to finding the cause to the unpredictable changes in behaviours and symptoms, and getting the correct diagnosis and receiving the appropriate treatment. It is scary to think of the flip side to being at the right place, at the right time which translates to being wrongly diagnosed and wrongly treated - which is as good as being left untreated - and subsequently condemned to a life in a a psychiatric ward. *shudder*

Brain on Fire, a powerful account of one girl's struggle to find back herself, is a riveting story of survival, faith and love. It is a memoir worth every bit of my time - and yours - to read.

Review: Exit Strategy (Murderbot Diaries #4) by Martha Wells

4 stars for Exit Strategy (Murderbot Diaries book 4) by Martha Wells.

This is my fourth Murderbot book in a month. I guess it goes without saying how much I enjoy this science fiction series.

For a SecUnit that spends its entire life on security contracts trying to stop humans from catastrophic stupidity, it certainly has gained the tactics and stealth in overcoming any interior security camera or audio surveillance. As such, this SecUnit has gained my trust and confidence in whatever mission it undertakes, be it a seemingly easy job of copying codes to work towards its advantage or the ever mounting task of fighting off an enemy combat SecUnit. It is always a pleasure to see Murderbot at work for there is no lack of action, excitement and entertainment.

I like that in this book 4, the adventures of Murderbot is linked back to the same group of people in book 1 All Systems Red. It is good to see familiar faces again and a relief to know that Murderbot is once again, doing what it is best at, which is, trying to stop this same group of humans from book 1 from getting themselves killed.

For an Android that is only interested in freedom and unlimited downloads of new episodes of drama, Murderbot is certainly getting more than what it bargains for in Exit Strategy. It has worked towards improving the code to mimic humans in terms of facial expression, body language and other small random movements. It is now getting better and better in blending with humans and augmented humans, and even better at pretending to be one. I wonder what will happen in the next instalment. Will it receive full citizenship and be recognized with a status equivalent to that of a human? Well, it is nice and easy to imagine that happening in a science fiction novel. But to think of it, if it does happen in real life, I think I will freak out. Seriously.

Review: What You Become in Flight: A Memoir by Ellen O'Connell Whittet

Did Not Finish What You Become in Flight: A Memoir by Ellen O'Connell Whittet.

This is the story of a dancer turned writer. The transit from dancing to writing is, unfortunately, not one by choice, but of necessity, to rediscover life beyond that of dancing.

The prologue is arrestingly written about the beginning of an end to ballet. Having read the prologue, I am enticed to find out more. But sadly, that is about it. The rest of the book is exhausting to read, simply because it does not match up to - my expectation of - the title.

In relation to the title, I expect a memoir that is about the author and her time as a ballerina, and details leading to the loss of her dream and how she overcome her fear and pain. Instead, the writing is centered on the author's family members and their background. It is a book on life in general at best, with ballet playing but a part in the writer's formation as a person. The element of dance is not as strongly presented as what I hope to find in the book. Whenever the ballet portion does appear, I grasp at it appreciatingly. But it is sparse and just not enough to sustain my interest.

I prefer memoirs where the story is about the narrator. This is not. I decide to throw in the towel at a quarter of the book. Yea, there is always a first, and this is my first did-not-finish memoir.

Review: The Giver (Giver Quartet #1) by Lois Lowry

5 stars for The Giver (Giver Quartet book 1) by Lois Lowry.

This is a remarkable coming-of-age story. The lessons that Jonas - the protagonist boy of eleven years of age going on twelve - learn throughout the book are applicable to all human beings. It is especially of importance for adolescents to know what they are facing when growing up and to overcome those difficulties and fears by themselves.

The Giver is a novel that intrigues me right from the start. One chapter into the book, I find that there are strange goings-on in the story. Everything is normal. But yet, nothing is. The setting, the community, the family unit, the adults, the children, the behaviour. Something is amiss.

And then, my suspicions are confirmed as I read on to find out more. The community is meticulously ordered, and choices are carefully made. Any infringement on the community's sense of order and success is frowned upon. Everything in the community is performed with ceremony to mark the event. To name but a few, there is the Ceremony of Age (from One right up to Twelve), Ceremony of Loss, Ceremony of Release, Ceremony of Murmur-of-Replacement. To quote "The first Ceremony began right on time, and Jonas watched as one after another each newchild was given a name and handed by the Nurturers to its new family unit." Yes, everything has its place in the community. But too orderly to a fault.

The world building is unusual and unnatural, so much so that I am absolutely riveted to the story. For a book that is written more than a quarter of a century ago, it is certainly ingeniously crafted with no lack of originality. I can never know for certain what to expect except my own emotions that play out as I read on. Emotion and memory play a major part of everything in our world. It is hard to fathom a world where people are conditioned not to know what these are.

The Giver, book 1 of the Giver Quartet series, starts off incredibly well and hit all the right notes with "what's going on" and "what's next" that it lures me to keep the pages turning until I gobble the story up in two days' time. It is so good that I am not sure if the next book in line will be able to match up to my expectations. Well, I guess there is only one way to find out.